How to find a Good Husband

Many girls know they want to get married.  (You probably want to as well otherwise you will not be here.)

 But few girls actually create a plan to help them get there and even fewer ask the question of how to find a good husband. But you should be asking such an important question and( I am glad you have) and you should also have a plan to help make it happen.

Let’s imagine for a minute that you are out on a walk and you come upon your favourite fruit tree.

  The tree is huge sturdy and beautiful with the greenest colour of leaves you have ever seen and to top it off it is laden with fruit in various stages of maturity and ripeness. 

Now by the tree, you see a signpost that says: You are free to pick one fruit.

Chances are you are not just going to reach out and yank the nearest fruit within your reach.

 You are going to take time to scan the tree with the intention of finding only the best. 

This might be the biggest or the ripest or whatever criteria you think makes it the best and once you have satisfied yourself that you have found the ‘one’ only then will you reach out and pluck it.

The selection process you have just undergone is just human nature we humans want nothing but the best for ourselves or at the very least what is good.

 Now if you can be picky about something as simple as a fruit selection from a tree or even one from a bowl in your kitchen then picking a good husband should be up at the top of your list if you nurture the dream of having a happy married life.

So the first tip here is that it is important to be deliberate about your search for a good husband. 

Not just any guy will do, not if you want a successful marriage anyway.

I repeat please be deliberate about your choice of a husband and the simple reason is that unlike a fruit which if by chance turns out to be bad you can’t easily trash or dispose of one.

That been said here as some tips to help you in search in how to get a good husband.

Open your eyes and look hard around you

As of 2020  for every 100 females, there is on our planet, there are about 101.69 males This according to staticstime.com

This is good news technically it means that you shouldn’t have a problem finding a husband. 

But you may wonder how many out of that are decent enough? 

Many girls believe outrightly that decent guys don’t exist. But that’s not true. They are out there looking for you.

what matters is that you are on the lookout for him as he is on the lookout for you.

And while there places you can go to that will increase your chances of finding the one he can be found anywhere. So keep your eyes open.

Now, as a girl, you may have been raised to think that you have zero contribution to make to the dating or getting married process until you are approached by a man. 

So you just go about with your life waiting hoping and praying for prince charming to slide into your life. 

In some cases and possibly most cases that is exactly what happens. But unfortunately, you can’t exactly say if that is how your own story will work out.

I am sure you must be thinking but isn’t it their job to chase after you? 

Well yes, but what if you see him and he doesn’t see you at first anyway? Then what?

 Besides what if the wrong guys are the ones that keep walking up to you and there is that nice guy you think is the one that you come across every day in church or in a bus are you just going to sit tight and keep your fingers cross?

Now if you don’t know this simple truth know it now: It’s ok for you to signal to a guy that you exist!

Now I have already emphasised the fact that it’s the guy’s job to chase.  But he can’t go after you if he doesn’t know you exist. (Fair enough right?) There are ways of doing that but that is a topic for another blog post. 

 What I am trying to say here is as Mr Right is on the lookout for you you need to be on the lookout for him. It doesn’t matter who finds who first what is important is that you do find each other and for that to happen you may have to be there one to take the first step.

 So from today whenever you go anywhere be aware. Don’t always be deep in thought or have your head buried in your phone. 

Take time to survey your surrounding be it in bus, school, church anywhere. You may have already crossed path with him a few times or he may already have been trying to get your attention but you haven’t noticed it. It’s also important for you to realize that not all guys will approach you directly. Shy guys do exist as well! 

Ask for help

Do you know the easiest and fastest way to land a job? (No I am not going off-topic here) think about it for a minute. Well, the answer is networking or as we say here in Nigeria man know man. 

The same thing can be applied to your search for a good husband. Leverage your family.

Now once upon a time I vehemently disliked the idea of having parents involved in this kind of thing primarily because it looked like them handpicking a partner for me. 

But the truth is at the end of the day you get to decide. The final decision falls on you. If they bring forward someone you don’t like simply and politely tell them no but give them a chance to assist you and here is why:

 They would lookout for the best for you and that is what you want in the long run. 

Just explain to them ultimately the final decision lies with you as it should be and don’t be tempted in the slightest to agree to be with someone you don’t like to please anyone. 

You will regret it in the long run.

Your friends are another group of people you can turn to ask to help you. 

Presuming of course that you have good friends. Again emphasis on good because as they say birds of the same feather flock together.

 So from a pool of good friends, you can get a good man. So inform them male or female married or single about what you want and most will be happy to assist.

Try to be in places where there is a high likely hood of meeting a decent guy

The easiest example I can think of is a church. That been said remember that bad boys also know that the church is a great place to find a good girl! 

So always do your due diligence by taking your time to know the person. Do not make any exception for any man regardless of where you first meet him. 

Other examples will include weddings, church groups, libraries, book clubs, chess club or groups for professionals(workers) or entrepreneurs or a group that supports a good cause like an NGO etc.

Now don’t just join any group. Find one that interests you and be a part of that. You and your future spouse should after all have things in common.

 Conversely, places like nightclubs are not great for finding Mr right because most guys that go there are looking to just have a good time and possibly find a girl they can take advantage of and not one to marry.

Be a good wife materrial

It’s time to look into the mirror.

Ask yourself this one serious question if a good guy is looking for a girl to settle down will /can that girl be you?

Will your friends be willing to easily introduce you to someone?

Perhaps a number of decent guys have already approached you but after getting to know you simply walked away.

 Ever wondered why or did just dismiss it as bad luck or something wrong with them and not you?

Good guys want to be with good girls in fact even bad guys want to be with good girls when they are ready to settle down.

This type of inner search may be hard to do but it’s very necessary you can get somebody close and trustworthy to help you. If there are some very serious negative aspects to your personality work hard to get rid of them.

Let me give you an example of why this is so key.  Sometime back I was following an interesting conversation on social media.

There was a domestic violence incident that was trending at that time.

The conversation at some point moved to a discussion about domestic violence against men specifically.

And a guy narrated how he took interest in a particular girl and after a number of discussions the subject of ex’s came up and the girl said something like “he got me so angry that I took his phone and smashed it on the ground.” 

The boy said he didn’t need anyone to tell him to take off.

And just like that the girl possibly lost a decent guy.

So your takeaway here is this: if you are a decent girl, decent guys should naturally be attracted to you.

Other key considerations are things like the way you dress. Men are very visual people. Chances are he may be attracted to how you look first before he begins to analyze your personality.

Now no need to go crazy over clothes or makeup. ( Some men don’t even like stuff like that) just whenever you step outlook decent and presentable in what makes you comfortable or what you like to wear.

Pray

As I was researching this article I came across a girl’s testimony on the power of asking God’s help in finding a good husband.

She was just coming out of another relationship that hadn’t worked out.  Her problem was that she kept coming across men that just weren’t treating her right.

She was unhappy and miserable and she went on her knees and asked God for his help promising to play by his rules and be more patient and not jump into any relationship out of fear of being alone.

According to her the very next she met her husband.

 At the end of the day, it is God who will ensure that you and the man you want to marry get together so be sure to petition him endlessly until he answers you.

So there you have it try giving some or all of these tips on how to find a good husband a try and if they work out for you reach out to me and let me know. 

I love hearing success stories and besides hearing about your own success will also help others.

One last thing if you enjoyed this article 

Share it especially with anyone who you know may benefit from it.

Cheers

p.s

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